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How To Stop People Pleasing - Saying No

"‘No, thank you.’ Is a complete sentence."

Say it with me, "I don’t have to explain my reasons to anyone."

How often do you say no, but then feel bad and offer a detailed explanation to try and make the other person understand? Or finish with, ‘I hope that’s ok?’

Anyone else? But what I’ve realised, is that when you do this, you give the other person all the power. You try to gain their approval of your decision.

Like you don’t trust yourself to have made the correct decision!

Although it is socially uncomfortable, we need to get used to the idea of just saying no. If people want to know your reasons they can ask, and then you can decide whether to share them or not.

Other people do not have the right to know your personal life or reasons for saying no, regardless of how close you are to them or whether they are in position of power over you (e.g. your boss).

After all, do they ask your reasons when you say yes?

Switch off your inner people pleaser and try just saying ‘No,’ or ‘No, thank you,’ this week and feel the difference in your confidence!


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