You are not responsible for anyone else’s actions, thoughts or happiness. I keep having to remind myself of this at the moment and tell myself that whilst I can give advice, I can’t make anyone do the work and I can’t hold myself accountable if they choose to ignore my advice. Basically, I can’t keep feeling guilty for how other people feel, especially if they are taking no action to change their circumstances. Every time I remind myself about this I feel a little lighter and

"‘No, thank you.’ Is a complete sentence." Say it with me, "I don’t have to explain my reasons to anyone." How often do you say no, but then feel bad and offer a detailed explanation to try and make the other person understand? Or finish with, ‘I hope that’s ok?’ Anyone else? But what I’ve realised, is that when you do this, you give the other person all the power. You try to gain their approval of your decision. Like you don’t trust yourself to have made the correct decision

There have been thousands of research papers published on self-confidence or self-esteem, and many of these papers connect self-confidence with success in life. They found that high self-esteem is associated with better health, better social lives, protection against mental disorders and social problems, healthy coping, and mental well-being. Martin Seligman reminds us that positive self-image by itself does not produce anything. A sustainable sense of belief in oneself arise

Last week I talked about setting personal boundaries, and I gave you an overview of the kind of things people, think, feel and do that prevent them from creating and maintaining personal boundaries. Today, let's channel Aretha Franklin and focus on the 4 major mistakes we make when it comes to self-esteem, confidence and self-respect. First, what is self-esteem? Some people think of self-esteem as their inner voice (or self-dialogue) – you know, the voice that tells you wheth

One issue that comes up time after time with clients is how to set and maintain personal boundaries. Quite often it comes up when clients experience huge stress and pressure from an unmanageable workload, constantly changing situations or expectations, the assumption that you will say yes or be able to accommodate every request. This leads to overwhelm and a feeling that you have no control. For others, their issue setting boundaries lies in their personal relationships and t

All change comes with risk. But how do you overcome the self-sabotaging thoughts and actually say yes?

Like me, are you counting down the days and hours until lockdown is lifted and we can emerge from our enforced chrysalis like a beautiful butterfly into the brilliant sunshine of spring? Or are you quite happy at home in your safe and comfy space, thank you very much?! Well, whatever your lockdown mindset, I've got the perfect tonic to get you through the next few months. Whether it's to accompany your daily walk, get you in the right frame of mind first thing, or give your l

Belonging is important to everyone no matter their age. When resting, our brains enter a default network which actually mimics the same neural cognitive system seen when we engage in social interaction. Even babies are biologically designed to seek out human connection and infants as young as 2 weeks old have been shown to exhibit the same neural network described above. Martin Seligman, the 'father of positive psychology,' developed a popular theory of wellbeing - PERMA - th

If there's one thing that's been under strain since the start of the pandemic, it's our relationships. Spending hours together in a limited number of rooms is surely enough to put even the strongest relationship to the test. Throw in home-schooling, whilst also trying to work from home, and you may have the perfect storm! But this article is not just about relationships with a partner or significant other. It also concerns the relationships you have with your children, parent

Transform Your Mind, Transform Your Life! You know that pile of clothes hanging on the treadmill you don't use? And the pile of papers you've been meaning to file but now resembles The Leaning Tower of Pisa? Well it might be time to do something about them, because research confirms they are bad for your physical and mental health. I know! I thought the same thing! How can a pile of inanimate objects impact my wellbeing? Well physically, clutter can cause a build up of dust,